good remedies for broken hearts are hard to come by. as i learned last night, follow any or all of these instructions for a recipe to success:

1. hug her. longer than it feels like she wants to be hugged.
2. feed her homemade white bean stew with pork
3. promise a massage but when you run out of time then give her something better (conversation, you dirty mind!)
4. put a bear hat on her head, first because it’s warm, and second because it’s silly
5. make her laugh
6. tell her she should cry if she needs to
7. hold her when she does
8. make her laugh again
9. take her to the grocery store
10. look for dried persimmons, because b*tches love persimmons
11. buy beer instead when you can’t find dried persimmons
12. drive her home and kiss her on the cheek

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